If you and your partner have picked divorce mediation as the process to end the marriage on amicable and understanding terms, you have to learn to negotiate issues, as you will be acting like your own lawyer. Both of you will share your side of the story concerning property, cars, pets, children, if you have any, and other valuable assets.
Whatever is decided during the divorce mediation sessions will be finalized and written down on settlement with both of your signatures, confirming your agreement and approval on the division of assets. Before you can reach that step, it is important for you to learn how to negotiate with your soon to be ex partner during divorce mediation sessions:
Make a Check list
Before the first divorce mediation session begins, you need to sit down, gather your thoughts, and write down everything you wish to want, the reason you should get it, and any evidence you can show your partner about why giving it to you is the right decision. For instance, you take with your pictures, calculations of the assets, and personal and financial documents.
Learn to Compromise
If your partner is claiming to want the same thing as you want, listen to them. You do not want to tell them that they are wrong or it’s unfair. If you let up on something, so will they. In the beginning of the meeting, do not jump to resolve bigger issues, but go after the smaller issues first to get them out of the way.
Resolve Smaller Issues
Bigger issues take time and multiple sessions to get to an agreement, but smaller issues only take one meeting. Do not discuss children, the house, or the car, but issues that both of you can quickly come to a resolution and compromise on.
Try Other Alternative Solutions
They may reject your solution and you may reject theirs, leaving you both undecided and frustrated. That’s why, you need to come up with alternative solution to conclude an issue. A solution that is neutral, meaning both of you benefit from it equally, if possible. You can come up with alternatives together during the meetings.
Remain Rigid on Certain Issues
In divorce, there will be always be something you are unwilling to compromise and give up on, and the same goes for your partner. This is where you can say, “I will let you have this in return for that.” Be firm and rigid when the issue comes up and have your evidence ready to support why you should have claims to that, if you have any. In the fight to get what’s yours, do not lose your cool and start to yell and argue. If you need to compose yourself, go outside, cool off, and then come back in.